Dear Editor,
“Simple humanity ought to be enough to reject a policy which moves the goalposts for people who came here legally, have lived and worked here for years, and now face waiting far longer before they can settle permanently. Does she seriously believe this is in any sense a moral policy, or is she doing it just to win the votes of the racists? Does it really matter which? Shabana Mahmood has no business being a senior government minister in the Labour Party.”
Although I usually find myself amused and entertained by Mr Pecksniff in his various guises, I felt that his usually fair and balanced mode of appraisal suffered an uncharacteristic lurch in “Pecksniff – The MPs’ terror that dare not speak its name: Brexit“ (19 September 2026), with his rather scathing condemnation of Shabana Mahmood.
First of all, she has an unenviable task with the subject of migrants. Almost everyone agrees that something needs to be done™, yet few except for those wallowing in the cesspit of the far right have a clear way of tackling it – at least not a legal one. The Tories tried to be as firm as they dared. Cruella Braverman proved to be too nasty even for the Tories, and swiftly shuffled off into the dark and lonely place on the back benches reserved for Reform. I exclude Grant Shapps from this, although they were far more inventive in his case by choosing somebody from a different planet.
With Labour back in power and Sir Keir Starmer – Labour’s ‘John Major for the masses’, only without the hokey-pokey – at the helm, Yvette Cooper was appointed as the next incumbent to walk the plank, simply for being far too nice. Enter Shabana Mahmood, who immediately stood out as going against party lines by successfully adopting a profile of firm but fair.
Grey rainclouds and thick, dense smog followed the PM everywhere, stifling both thought and vision as well as generally dampening the mood. It was at this point that Starmer found himself unceremoniously defenestrated. It isn’t generally known to the public, but this is one of the compulsory words in the official lexicon handed to all new MPs on their first day in the Commons. Others include: clear; perfectly clear; absolutely clear; clearly clear; egregious; black hole; circuit breaker; psycho-drama and disingenuous.
Enter Andy Burnham, a man who knows that something needs to be done™. Normal practice is for the new head of the pride to kill all the former’s cubs. In an unexpected twist, Shabana retained her place, but was possibly told that she could be just a little bit nastier if she wanted to, as long as she didn’t do anything to frighten the horses or arouse any of the Tory old guard who might rather like that kind of thing. She affected this with aplomb, posing for publicity shots reminiscent of Il Duce, combining this with the outward warmth of Miss Trunchbull. But is this all a cunningly crafted move to bamboozle the opposition?
Pragmatism seems all the rage at the moment, used by politicians everywhere as an excuse to excuse the inexcusable. Posters of Shabana won’t be decorating any wall of the Labour Left, but deep down they must surely know that she is necessary for their survival. Without her they would be the ‘Labour-somewhere-vaguely-to-the-left-of-left-of-centre’, which would need a lapel badge as big as a saucer to fit it all on.
She’s the bad cop to Andy Burnham’s good cop; she’s the devil’s advocate, hinting at strict policies rather than enforcing them, side-stepping her opponents and heading them off at the pass. Deep inside, the Labour Left must surely know that their idealistic, laissez-faire policies would be counter-productive. Like it or not, they go against the public mood and would be a gift to the most unsavoury elements of politics, who are lurking like hyenas, eagerly lapping up opportunities to prey on the hard of thinking.
Shabana Mahmood is Labour’s secret weapon. She acts as a firebreak (was that on my list?) between Labour and the political right, but at the same time pushing Jeremy Corbyn into the retirement home for the perpetually bewildered. She may not have all the right badges on her parka, but Labour MPs must surely realise how essential she is to their future employment.
Peter Sharpe
Bourne
