Dear Editor,
I enclose an open letter to my Suffolk Coastal MP, Dr. Thérèse Coffey.
1.4.2022
Dear Dr Coffey,
I’m sure few people write to you admitting the error of their ways; however, mea culpa!
In the past I’m afraid I have been somewhat critical of the Tory government, your policies and actions. But I now see that my somewhat ‘woke’, green, liberal attitudes have been misplaced – and even counter-productive.
How wrong was my assumption that the individual has a responsibility to help others and strive to a more equal society; I now see that we must aim higher, and personal achievement at whatever cost to others and the environment is the way to improve society – indeed – survival of the fittest leading to a better society. Gazing at the serried blue ranks of Tory MPs, I now see that Darwin was right.
How embarrassed I feel now at carping at the PPE ‘VIP’ Fast Track deals, when I should have realised the importance of ‘keeping it in the family’, eliminating dangerous unsolicited tenders with their consequent drag on resources. What if some of the deals fall by the wayside? I didn’t understand that this is purely the natural trajectory of entrepreneurship – indeed – a spur to invention. Oh, fool, fool, that I was.
Crystal clear to me now: Britain was built on making sure the right chaps got the jobs – what a dreary egalitarian state we would be if we ‘opened things up’ to any Tom, Dick or Harriet.
And Brexit: how pathetic the whimperings of the Moaning Minnie ‘Remainers’ (and, yes, count me in their miserable numbers) with their nit-picking, negative views. I just couldn’t foresee the overweening glory of freedom from European constraints, to be a world power in our own right; the Churchillian stature of our PM, standing aloof from others at a G20 reception. I now revel in our independence to negotiate trade deals, and rejoice in the ability of Vanuatu to import Duchy Original Orange Thins with no tariffs.
Yes, I have seen the light – even if it is a flashing blue one, quite rightly intent to see that I’m not indulging in any peaceful ‘demonstration’.
With this in mind, I would like to offer my services to help in your forthcoming election campaign, perhaps ensuring the appropriate distribution of election leaflets? Checking that election posters haven’t been defaced? Or giving elderly Tory voters a lift on polling day? I’m sure I can be of help.
Yours, conservatively,
Dr Wil Harvey
Wenhaston, Suffolk
